Knitting Rules . . . OK?

15 July 2008

If you’re reading this, it’s probable that knitting is your hobby.  That’s right – YOUR hobby.  As far as I’m concerned, you can knit what you want, when you want, in whatever yarn you want.  Whatever makes you happy. 

There are no Knitting Police.  And there are no Knitting Rules.

Well, I’m now wondering if perhaps there should be.  Or one, at least.  So here goes:


Knitting Rule No. 1:

If you are aged 10 years or over with English as your first language, you will not be permitted to commence knitting until it has been satisfactorily determined that you are able to spell the word ‘GAUGE’.

It has only 5 letters and is included in practically every knitting pattern you’re likely to have seen (unless, of course, it’s an older English one, in which case it will be called ‘tension’)


  1. Oh, hell, I’m trying to think of every post and e-mail I’ve sent you, wondering if I’m the one that set you off!!! All my life I’ve been a spelling FREAK, and lately, I’ve been making the most idiotic of mistakes. Are my typing fingers lagging behind my speedy brain? Is senility getting closer? (Maybe it’s the new exercising plan – and I’m losing brain cells instead of arse cells?)

    If it was me, let me know, and I’ll write it 10 times and use it in a sentence, like we did in school years ago.

  2. I find all sorts of spelling and grammar errors irritating. then I look at my own typing and I swear I know that be is not spelt eb, or of fo, and form is not the same as from. But I cannot for the life of me type letters in their correct order.

    And, worst of all, I sometimes miss the errors before pressing post. Then i sweat and blush, all alone here in the house.

  3. As a touch typist, I sometimes find that I’ve rearranged the letters in a word so that I can type them with adjacent fingers…

  4. Actually it is still Tension in current English patterns. The tanks call it gauge.

  5. Oh, I hope it wasn’t me! I’m with Emily; I hate posting a comment and then discovering my spelling error! I almost feel sick!

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